Fifty Shade’s of Sex Appeal

Many of us would go to pretty great lengths to improve our sex lives, and Cosmopolitan writer Frank Kobola is apparently no exception. Kobola undertook an experiment to see if acting like Christian Grey for a week would improve his sex life with his wife. In case you’ve never read Fifty Shades of Grey, Christian Grey is one of the main characters, an eccentric, mysterious billionaire playboy with notable quirks and a palpable sex appeal.

So what would happen if the average person copied his sultry mannerisms in an effort to up their sex appeal? Well as it turns out, this isn’t the perfect, clear cut experiment that one might expect. For starters, as Kobola points out, he’s no billionaire. Part of Christian Grey’s charm and attitude comes from his immense wealth, allowing him to get away with things that your average person simply couldn’t. While you can definitely mimic attitude, you can’t really mimic wealth. With that being said, Kobola highlights three instances of note that took place during this experiment.

In the series, Christian Grey is known for his pensive stare, an smoldering, dominating look that allows him to be both intimidating and attractive. While Christian Grey can easily stare his way into getting what he wants, Kobola found out the hard way that imitating Christian Grey’s trademark stare was a great way to look like an asshole. When his wife asked him if he wanted to make dinner, Kobola’s best “Christian Grey Stare” only served to irritate his wife.

In a hilarious attempt at a powermove, Kobola attempted to try and assert dominance with his money. Again, there are some key inconsistencies between Kobola and Grey, namely the fact that Grey is a billionaire (and at least for the better part of the series, a bachelor). Kobola attempts to assert financial dominance by trying to buy a gallon of milk with loose change before his wife can, which ultimately results in confusion and extra hassle.

Kobola’s last notable (and not to mention NSFW) instance came about after he attempted to mimic Grey’s skills at sexual dominance. To sum things up, Kobola’s wife quickly and adamantly refused to put a butt plug in before meeting her parents for dinner. As you can guess, she wasn’t turned on be any of Kobola’s attempts at mimicking Christian Grey, making the overall experiment a failure. Perhaps Grey’s mannerisms are simply too intense to mimic successfully, or maybe Kobola’s lack of immense wealth is too big a barrier to circumnavigate. All things considered, I think we can all agree that the effectiveness of Christian Grey’s mannerisms should be taken with a grain (or perhaps even a heaping spoonful) of salt.